Toxic Relationship Signals That May Not be Obvious

It is likely that at some point in your life you have heard the phrase toxic relationship. Though the phrase is tossed around often, it can be hard to fully understand what signifies a toxic relationship. According to the dictionary, toxic relates to being extremely harsh or harmful, so applied to a relationship, this can never be positive. At the core, toxic relationships tend to manifest as someone asserting power over another person to cause them to question their worth and value. The tricky part is that toxic relationships can be difficult to navigate because it may be almost impossible to know you are in one. This is due to relationship blinders that leave you oblivious to toxicity. Friends and family may notice, but you may not see what they do from within. Below is a list of toxic relationship signs and what to do if you find you are in one and need out.

  • Gaslighting – When a partner tells you how you feel or devalues feelings when you share them openly
  • Partner Blames You – Also known as scapegoating, a partner will put their problems on you causing you to feel shame and guilt for something that is not yours to bear
  • Isolation – A toxic individual will often try to isolate a partner to gain control, keeping you from family and friends
  • Playing Victim – If you share feelings and your partner always seems to be able to turn around those feelings to make them the victim, the relationship may be toxic
  • More Stress, Anxiety, and Worry – All relationships have stressful times, but if you are more stressed and anxious when around your partner then there is a problem
  • Nightmares – Nightmares that continually involve your significant other is your inner psyche trying to get your attention
  • Hiding Things that have Happened – If you have ever shared a story about your significant other, but left out a detail to make them look better, it could be a problem, especially if you did not add it because you are ashamed
  • Excuses for Bad Behavior – If you are constantly making excuses for their bad behavior, even just to yourself, the relationship may be toxic
  • Controlling – If your partner is telling you what it okay to say, wear, or do then things are toxic
  • You Would Never Date Their Friends – If your partner is surrounded by people who lack in morality and common sense, your relationship will suffer and this is obviously the type of people they attract, this is a problem

Fixing a Toxic Relationship

If the list above sounds familiar to your relationship, it is likely you are in something toxic. However, this is a list, not a checklist that a certain number of red flags means things are doomed. The focus is on whether or not you are losing yourself in the relationship and being compromised. If this is the case, you have options. If you cannot make the relationship work when you are being your true self, then it is time to walk away. This is unhealthy.

If you want to work on the issues, therapy can help build and restore the relationship, but only if both people are willing to do the work. At the core of every healthy relationship is trust, communication, and honesty. If these things cannot be attained, it is time to move on to something much healthier.

8 thoughts on “Toxic Relationship Signals That May Not be Obvious

  1. The article elucidates the nuanced dynamics of toxic relationships effectively. It provides valuable insight into signs that may not be readily apparent to the individuals involved, highlighting the importance of self-awareness in such contexts.

  2. ‘Isolation’ as a tactic utilized by toxic partners speaks volumes about control dynamics in relationships. This point serves as a reminder that maintaining connections outside of romantic partnerships is vital for emotional stability.

  3. The article effectively outlines various signs of toxic relationships, yet it also leaves room for reflection on human complexities. Understanding these behaviors requires both introspection and a willingness to confront uncomfortable truths.

  4. ‘Playing victim’ as a sign of toxicity brings forth important conversations about accountability in relationships. Both partners must navigate their roles and contributions to maintain balance and health in their interactions.

  5. ‘Excuses for bad behavior’ might often be overlooked by those deeply invested in relationships. However, recognizing this pattern could be pivotal in determining whether one should seek change or exit the relationship entirely.

  6. It is intriguing how the concept of relationship blinders is discussed. This notion underscores the necessity for external perspectives when evaluating one’s personal circumstances, a reminder that social support plays a crucial role in personal clarity.

  7. The emphasis on gaslighting as a primary indicator of toxicity resonates with contemporary discussions about mental health. Acknowledging this behavior is essential for fostering healthier interpersonal connections.

    1. I agree with you; gaslighting can indeed distort one’s perception of reality. It’s vital for individuals to remain vigilant and critically evaluate their experiences within relationships to safeguard their mental well-being.

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